Here's how it went:
MOM: It rained this morning. I hope it doesn't rain during the yard-sale.
Kids, do you want to earn some money? We can have a yard-sale in that old field. We can bring the dog and the iguana to play while we try to sell our old stuff.
KID #1: No, thanks.
MOM: What if I let you keep the money we make? We can sell each piece of clothing for 2 RMB.
KID #1: No, thanks.
MOM: How about if we sell everything for 5 RMB?
KID #1: No, thanks.
MOM: 10?
KID #1: Ok. But you can't take the iguana.
KID #2: Can we take the hamster?
MOM: No, she's too small. She'll get lost.
KID #2: What if we put her in a circle so she can't get out?
MOM: Ok. Kids, let's gather some hangers, and tape and permanent markers for marking our prices.
KID #1: I want to sell some old toys.
KID #2: Me too!
MOM: Ok, just get together what you want to sell, and we'll head over there. I need to borrow your clothes rack, please.
KID #2: How about if I take everything out of my cubbies and we can put stuff to sell in the cubbies?
MOM: That would take a really long time, and then you'd have a huge mess. Let's go! I need you to carry this bag and you to carry this bag, and I need you to put the marker and tape in here, and the hamster goes in here. I'll get the dog and this rack.
[Accidentally hits dog with rack and dog bolts ahead only to get caught because he's on the leash]
MOM: Oops. Please get the elevator, kids!
KID #1 (to KID #2): You can actually walk through Jello.
KID #2 (to KID #1): Woah, wooh, oooHh! Part of my body is in the Jello and the other part of my body is out!
MOM: So nobody wanted to push the button? What are we waiting for?
KID #2: We're waiting for somebody else to choose to come up to the 4th floor so it will open and be ready to go down with us.
MOM: Right. Ok, I'll push the button.
[ding! Elevator stops on the 2nd floor and a mother with baby in stroller eyes the situation and decides to wait for another elevator]
[ding! Elevator stops on the 1st floor and we all unload, carrying oh so much stuff]
MOM: Ok, kids, lets get to the field.
[Chinese neighbors, knowing how weird we are, still stare and wonder what we're up to with a clothes rack, 2 bags of clothes, a children's tea set and a dog]
[Chinese pedestrians whisper while the caravan makes their way to the forested portion of the field. Mom says to Kid #2:]
MOM: Can you take the dog for a minute while I set up here?
KID #2: Sure! [Accepts dog leash and trots away]
KID #1: I want to mark these toys for 3 RMB each, and this one can be 1 RMB
MOM: Wait a minute. I should mark this rack of clothes first. [5 RMB] Ok, here's the marker and tape.
KID #2: The dog doesn't want to walk with me anymore. The field is really wet and he won't go with me.
MOM: Ok, I'll take him for a bit. You guys can put your prices on your toys for a while.
[Shop-owner creeps farther from shop door to be closer to the street to see what is happening with the two foreign kids and the small rack of clothes]
[Mom watches from the safe covering of the little jungle section to see if intrigue will convince anybody to actually browse the items]
[Minutes pass, feeling like hours]
[Dog is wet and cold and no longer interested in the smells of this cold, wet place]
[More curious passersby get a little closer, or slow down in their cars to see what is happening, but nobody is curious enough to ask or stop to browse]
[Mom decides positioning the items in the wet grass might be a hindrance to the effort, and calls to Kid #1:]
MOM: Kid #1, please take the dog around for a bit; I'm going to move the clothes rack to a better location near the walkway out of the mud.
KID #1: Why?
MOM: I think more people will be willing to stop if they aren't needing to cross the wet field to get to the goods.
KID #1: Ok.
KID #2: What're you doing, Mom?
MOM: I'm going to move these things over there so more people will come look and buy it.
KID #2: I'll help you, ok?
MOM: Can you please stay with the hamster, instead?
KID #2: I can bring the hamster with me, ok?
MOM: Ok.
[Mom and Kid #2 relocate while Kid #1 attempts to interest dog in more of the cold, wet areas of the field]
[Mom leaves rack to go get other bags. Rack is blown down by wind recently exposed due to lack of proximity to forest/jungle/rock-pile portion of the field]
KID #2: I'll get that!
MOM: It's ok [coming back], I've got it, Kid #2.
[Fixes rack and goes back to get other bags]
[Sets up in new area. Waits for minutes that seem like hours. Takes pictures of cute little field-sale.]
KID #1: Mom! Dog won't go anywhere except towards home. Can I take him home?
[Mom, believing that the cuteness of foreign children are more likely to bring interested parties thinks she should instead let the kids try together for a while and offers:]
MOM: No, I can take him home and get more hangers.
KID #1: Ok. But I don't want to see my toys anymore. I just want to go home.
KID #2: I don't want to sell my tea set anymore. Just my ball.
MOM: How about we change the price of these clothes? [marks 1 RMB on the other side of the 5 RMB paper] We can give in 5 more minutes, ok?
[Ball drops and rolls into the street. Kid #2 chases ball into street just like in movies where a car comes to make cute little hood ornament of Kid #2. Only 1/2 of passersby are staring before Mom yells at the top of her voice:]
MOM: KID #2!! STOP RIGHT NOW!! LEAVE THE BALL! STOP, KID #2, STOP NOW!!
[Now all passersby are staring]
[Ball rolls downhill, and kind strange man picks it up and holds the ball for Kid #2 to come get it from him... unseen by Mom...]
[Kid #2 starts running again when Mom thinks Kid #2 has lost it again, and screams again:]
MOM: LEAVE THE BALL! WE'LL GET IT LATER! DON'T CHASE THE BALL; DON'T EVER CHASE BALLS INTO A STREET!
KID #1: Look, Mom. That guy got it for her.
Mom: ..... [looks and is quite ashamed of the spectacle unnecessarily created] oh, Ok, go get it.
[Kid #2 runs down the hill to the man who has been holding the ball for almost a minute now, which must've seemed like an hour, wondering what kind of mother would not let her child retrieve a found lost-ball]
[Kid #2 happily returns with the ball]
MOM: Ok, I'm going to take the dog back now, and get some more hangers. You stick together and stay with Ellie, ok?
KIDS #1 & 2: Ok.
[As mom walks away, Kids have their first customers: a family with a little boy stopping to look at the overpriced 3 RMB used toys. Probably not thinking the singularity of the experience is worth 3 RMB for a used toy from inside a chocolate bar, they walk away.]
[As mom gets farther away, the clothing rack falls down. Mom thinks to herself she should not get more hangers, but just return soon to take everything down and give up.]
[Dog is returned, and Mom is walking back towards Kids, and sees they have a once-again upright clothes rack]
MOM: Ok, let's be done.
KIDS #1 & 2: YAY!!
[Gathers things as a car pulls up next to the rack and stops traffic behind it. Horns honk.]
[A surge of excitement at the prospect of a customer stopping for a yard sale just like it would be back home in the good ol' entrepreneurial USA makes Mom hesitate, but, seeing the passengers of the stopped car remain fixated away from the little clothes rack, continues dismantling]
MOM: Here, Kids, please take these bags, and this hamster.
[Kids take bags and hamster. Mom walks behind them, musing at the interesting lack of interest in this neighborhood with such a gulf between the rich and poor, and nobody brave enough to come see the used clothes for only 1 RMB]
MOM [speaking in broken Chinese to woman carrying a bag of used drink bottles she's collected from the garbage cans]: We don't want this. Do you want this? [holding a large bag of clothes]
SURPRISED WOMAN: You don't want this? It's so nice! Ok.
KID #1 [after Mom arrives at elevator]: Weren't you carrying another bag?
MOM: Yeah, but there was a lady who wanted it.
KID #1: So you gave it to her for free?
MOM: Yeah.
KID #1: Ok.
[Suit later donated to local dry cleaning lady that likely sells unclaimed items somewhere anyway, but sadly, we don't know the buyers. Being Caucasians in China, we don't really send out the 'come hither and buy these used items' vibe... more like the 'come hither and stare because we look weird and we're doing weird stuff' vibe.]
Fun day!
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| Setting up |
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| Distracting the dog |
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